Nickname Giver Pillows

'Thirty,love...My lovey!'

'That's 'Buddha,' not 'Bubba'!'

Grace For Flies

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

Sana's Back with his soot eating grin.

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

"As this is a civil ceremony, I'd rather you took the vows without swearing."

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

celebrating a birth.

Say it with flowers

'You got anything that says I put some thought into this gift?'

'If you really loved me you would have bought me flowers.'

'Yeah, yeah, very cute... she couldn't have just sent me an e-card?'

'No sharing gifts! You get the Teddy Bear, he gets the bone.'

It started friendly enough...'I'm Henry VIII, my dear, but you may call me 'Hank'.'

"And lastly, for my infinite perseverance, self-control and fortitude, I'd like to thank the Internet trolls."

Psychiatrist says: 'Oh, no! Not another fruit cake?'

'Good morning pumpkin.' 'Good morning treasure.' A pile of treasure saying 'good morning' to a pumpkin

Love.

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

"I get the strange feeling this has happened before."

'Tom will coordinate our pre-holiday point-of-purchase displays and Mark will coordinate our post holiday point-of-return displays.'

'Why thankyou! ... and I've got one for you!'

Birthday Racing Car

Valentines Balloons

'I had to give a short speech last night. It was a hoot!'

'We outsource our grape juice, marketing, bottling and distribution, and yet he's supposed to give a speech tonight on winemaking - bosses,outsources,outbetter show him what a grape looks like.'

'Do I have to give thanks for all the spinach, or just the bite I'm going to eat?'

'And that,and that,and that...'

New life (organ donation)

'I'm retiring, to spend more time with my family of mutual find investments,'

Saying Grace.

'Awww, isn't that nice: This one says 'PS: Love to Rudolph!''

"I'd like to thank my family, but, to be honest, I'm pretty sure I could've done it without them."