Nickname Enthusiasts Pillows

New inductees

"Interesting nickname - 'Tiny.' How do you come by it?"

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

'I've drawn up a shortlist of baby names.'

"Yes, you were born into the era of passwords and user-names. . . why do you ask, Mycat_2014?"

It started friendly enough...'I'm Henry VIII, my dear, but you may call me 'Hank'.'

'Good morning pumpkin.' 'Good morning treasure.' A pile of treasure saying 'good morning' to a pumpkin

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

"Are you the one they call El Cóndor?"

'And though he died during the hunt, we can only assume that George L Jones would want this new species of butt-faced clown monkey to forever bear his name.'

Naming that Impala

Tom Cruise

'I know you can make this project go. That's why I call you 'The Magic Motor'.'

"Sinead?!"

"Really? 'Yeller'? That's what you want to name him?"

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

Books: Names That Will Make Your Child Hate You!

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"

1,001 names to Embarrass Your Child for Life.

Proof you've made it Loud Annoying The voices raised against you

'For the sake of convenience everybody just calls me Joe.'

Mr Long and Miss Short.

"One of you will be Kevin, one will be Kev and one will be K. You decide who."

Changing house name.

"Some people call me a ball-buster, but I prefer cojones-crusher."

'Therefore I do christen this child 'Isyouis Oris You Ain't.''

Margaret...Meatball

Bud's Club...Where Buds, Bubs and Bros gather!

"All the good band names are taken by microbreweries."

'Theodore seemed much more approachable when he began going by his childhood name.'

"These are my sons, Brayden, Caden, Aiden, and Maiden."

A word to the wise. At this morning's meeting you were referred to as the 'the bottleneck'.