Affectionate Nickname Enthusiasts Pillows

"His reputation as a tough guy was dented when his Valentine called him ‘cuddle bottom’."

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

'I've drawn up a shortlist of baby names.'

It started friendly enough...'I'm Henry VIII, my dear, but you may call me 'Hank'.'

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

'Good morning pumpkin.' 'Good morning treasure.' A pile of treasure saying 'good morning' to a pumpkin

'And though he died during the hunt, we can only assume that George L Jones would want this new species of butt-faced clown monkey to forever bear his name.'

"Are you the one they call El Cóndor?"

"… She's simply asking that you no longer refer to her as 'the dog.'"

Tom Cruise

"Costs have risen by 200% and we are behind schedule. We are living up to our acronym gentlemen and I am not happy about it!!"

Books: Names That Will Make Your Child Hate You!

'I know you can make this project go. That's why I call you 'The Magic Motor'.'

"Sinead?!"

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

"Really? 'Yeller'? That's what you want to name him?"

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"

1,001 names to Embarrass Your Child for Life.

'For the sake of convenience everybody just calls me Joe.'

"I was listening at the door and I overheard the nickname they have for me."

"Don't you think after thirty years of marriage you could stop referring to me as 'the military'?"

'My husband's first name? Heck, I don't know! I call him `wimp` since we met the first time'!

Mr Long and Miss Short.

"One of you will be Kevin, one will be Kev and one will be K. You decide who."

'Therefore I do christen this child 'Isyouis Oris You Ain't.''

Margaret...Meatball

"Some people call me a ball-buster, but I prefer cojones-crusher."

A word to the wise. At this morning's meeting you were referred to as the 'the bottleneck'.

'Theodore seemed much more approachable when he began going by his childhood name.'