New Parent Chuckle Seeker Gifts

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

'BEEP! BEEP! Pregnant Lady Reversing!...'

'Congratulations Mr. Dumley, you have a lovely little thing...'

Cupid and stork ambush young couple.

'Oh Darling look. He's got your colour boogies!'

'Oh wonderful! All day I've been waiting for that burp!'

"I can hardly wait for him to start leading a life of quiet desperation."

'Mom, will the baby come with bundled software?'

Husband and Child in Pram

They Removed my Brain.

'This might be a good time to discuss a few grievances.'

Beware of teething baby.

'I promise you we'll have him out of here real fast... we need the rest.'

'Sandra, I think the baby needs his oil changed.'

"I think our bundle of joy needs his mommy, dear!"

"Twins!...Who's the other father?"

'That's my girl. The one in the white uniform.'

'Your son couldn't come. He sent his sister.'

Twins

'I don't believe it - At school all my teachers said I was an underachiever!'

'It's OK, being completely egocentric is perfectly normal for someone your age.'

"You went here instead of the maternity ward. Fortunately, we experts in delivery too!"

"When do I get my phone call"

"Did he sleep through the night again?"

'Of course I respect him more than you - He's house trained!'

Mobile Phone Mobile.

Clearance sale. Everything must go!

"Dress it up all you want – it's still and invasion of my privacy."

The Impractical Guide to Babies: 'Give us a toot...'

'So that's why babies don't have teeth.'

3 Kings - "I think nappies would have been more useful than Frakinsense."

Two breasts: No waiting

'Baby skunk delivery.'

"'Do not ignite flares while still in cabin.' SENSIBLE!!"