New Apartment Lease Pillows

'I'm sorry, but I don't feel comfortable with signing a long term lease.'

"Now, I'm ready for summer."

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

A man sees a leak in his ceiling and drills a hole in the floor under leak to by pass his apartment.

A man is living in small box apartment trying to read a book, but is surrounded by people engaging in noisy activities.

"Flat pack furniture is my passion. It's just a shame I haven't the space to assemble it."

'It's just some Pour 'n' Serve, Stir 'n' Blend, Bake 'n' Slice, Mix 'n' Broil and Chop 'n' Simmer.'

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

"You'll love this model, sir! You won't have to miss any of the sports action when you go for a beer!"

Shakespeare Street

It's not considered drinking alone if the cat is at home.

"WOW...this 50.1 theatre sound system makes you feel you're actually in the movie!"

Fish-tank Skyscraper.

"I thought we'd eat out on the patio for a change."

'It's a giant inkblot on loan from the psychiatrist who owns the unit next door.'

'There goes any chance of us getting our security deposit back.'

"I rented out the basement."

'We know you have a cat.'

"Time like these make me wish we had sprung for that apartment with a park view."

'Honey, the neighbors have persuaded me to stop coming out into the hallway every morning to play 'reveille'!'

"What should I wear to the living room today?"

"We've decided to convert the dungeon into studio apartments, so kill all the prisoners."

"This condo includes free access to fitness facilities...7 flights of stairs."

Dog thumping tail on floor, man below thumping ceiling with broom.

'Well, the rent is a bit more expensive than usual because there are only 1 327 482 other tenants...'

Natural Phenomena of 15-E

'And here we have the half bathroom.'

'No it's still not fixed'

'Mr. Fitzburger, didn't we agree on a no-pets-in-the-apartment policy?!!'

Living comfortably with electric appliances.

For the musician strapped for space...the Murphy piano.