Nerf Gun Fan T-Shirts

Baby World Leaders

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

"Sure my wings flap 70 times per second-- I've been sipping nectar all day."

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

Nurse's introduction training - "We don't get the quality of student we used to"

Game In A Can.

'MEN! We've got a fire at the cattle shed! Do we want rare, medium or well done?'

'Does the gym have a motorized version of this cycle?'

"All rise."

'Due to budget cutbacks we are combining our annual employee dinner with The Seven Basic Quality Control Tools Training.'

'This patch is to quit smoking...this patch is to quit drinking...this patch is to quit drugs...this patch is to quit coffee...and this patch is to quit having any kind of fun whatsover!'

'Sure I said I love 'new car smell', but not as an aftershave.'

Daisy had the fastest udders in the west field.

'Since you lost your job you're really taking this 'taxi-driver for your kids' thing seriously, Dad.'

"Before rising all the way to the executive suite, the fire had its modest start in the company mailroom."

"I didn't know we were supposed to flush them!"

"Isn't that adorable? He learned that in Karate class."

Veteran mistakes ironclad ship for Noah's Ark

Woman stuck doing situps has spider web being built under arm

'Oh sure, he's the fastest in the west alright, until it comes to buying a round.'

'What training do I get?'

Angry pensioner

Self-driving fire engine...quickly responds to an alarm.

Next time I get to choose the weapon first.

Fitness Equipment. Home Gym. Who do people buy expensive exercise equipment? Because they don't have tails to chase.

'Wow, I'll earn my black belt in no time.'

Pilates Creative Stretching Program.

Smoking Firemen.

Plank

Cylinder Head

'Long time no see, 'Slim.' I'm guessing you're not as fast as you used to be.'

Coming to a crossroads in his life, Pinnochio faced a difficult decision.

"Sorry. . . Houston isn't here at the moment - but if you'd like to leave a message. . ."

'You're doing it wrong!'

"Sorry ma'am. My computer says this is the wrong building."