Neighborhood Bbq Pillows

If his animals should stray - let him know by all means...but don't be vindictive.

'My neighbors do a lot of backyard grilling.'

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

$1: Family Secrets

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

"Want me to talk to the squirrel's mother, or would you prefer to handle it on your own?"

"Bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark"

"Isn't it great to get out of the kitchen and cook in the fresh air!"

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

Ode to a Grill

'Henderson always walks away with the neighborhood pumpkin carving contest.'

'Has anybody seen the flyswatter?'

"My secret is having a ton of money to buy the best ingredients."

'The Wilsons picked up a quarterback in the off-season. The Riveras picked up a quarterback. The Ludwigs picked up a quaterback...'

"He's 'getting the grill ready for summer,' which means he's washing out the beer cooler."

'Do you realize he barked all last night?'

"I said 'neighborhood watch'; they said 'peeping Tom.' "

'You sure your dad won't mind if we use his silicone spray?'

Mrs Jones's fish pie could be smelt for miles around!

"The house next door is slated for demolition, but your house is in the way."

Barbecue Fetch

'Oh, hi!... yes, we have another emergency... make it the usual, and you know the address!'

'Barry, I think I know where you left the champagne bottle.'

"Honestly, all three of them were mistakes."

'I told you that chicken wasn't cooked!'

'Don't Move!' - 'Why would I want to move? Lived here for 51 years, know all the neighbours, shops nearby, post office is closed but...'

'Happy Town' See the smiley face?

"It's only the Ericksons, so why don't you just use the recalled hamburger meat."

'John... is that a collar?'

Hal is such a nice guy, every dog in the neighborhood brings him slippers.

"Me, I love vacuuming: it makes the dog next door barking mad! Works every time..."

This could be a whole new look for you, Harold!

"The moment we met, I knew he was the man I'd settle for."

'Your neighbor wanted me to break up a wild party, but actually, I find this a congenial affair,'