Neighbor With A Dog Mugs

Things to do: 1. Sit 2. Stay 3. Sit 4. Stay

"He ran out of pee."

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

'Don't be embarrassed by your anti-barking collar, implanted tracking chip, and GPS device. Just think of them as fashion accessories.'

'They're dog roses!'

"I think I'm beginning to embrace humiliation."

'Marm doesn't understand, 'I've got it, I've got it'.'

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

'Surely they don't expect us to carry around THAT sort of money?'

'We had him trained to stay off the furniture, right up until we gave up.'

'Max and I have a give and take relationship. He sniffs my butt...and I let him.'

"Is listening to her talk about her feelings worth a tiny can of tuna?"

When Dogs Rule

"Oh, for Pete’s sake – it’s the ocean!"

"True, it is 'organic.' It's also a dead squirrel!"

Dog Sees Only Food

Fetching some fuel.

'Sure, I could be independent, but it's so much nicer to allow myself to be spoiled rotten by Mistress...'

'No need to shout.'

"Ever since I started reading the newspaper online, he's been bringing me my laptop."

Dog's game

'Have you seen little Spotty?'

"The fragrance of the pines alloys so wonderfully with that dead carcass I'm about to roll in."

"I hate it when he gets all Robin Williamsy."

'Perhaps you'd like to explain this,'

"Fetch! What about a please?"

"Officer, my cat's stuck up a tree again"

'No, Mrs. Dudley! If there's a bone in a chair, that means it's reserved for Marmaduke!'

"Trust me – she's a witch."

'you just don't get the idea of being a watchdog, do you?'

Man look over neighbours fence at a man mowing his lawn. He is wearing a suit of armour to protect him from stones being thrown up by mower.

"Well, when you were called a 'bad dog,' were you publicly harmed?"