Necktie Collector Gifts

"Other men manage to confine whimsy to their boxers."

When God compliments your tie, just go with it.

'This is the only part of my old Army uniform that still fits.'

Cat Tie

"But don't let my wacky tie fool you. We actually take business very seriously around here."

Special offer on snakeskin ties.

"1-1"

'Luxury cruise you said!'

'Here was proof that Lawrence was indeed an Englishman."

'We started wearing name tags to rell who's who, unfortunately we all like the name 'Kevin,!'

'Who cares what she thinks? Grow a pair and buy the damn thing.'

A man at a cocktail party wears a nametag that reads "Trouble".

'The latest market research shows that men's neckware width is the most accurate indicator of market fluctuations.'

"Yeah, this many ways to contact her if I'm lost might be overkill."

"I'm a stay-at-work dad."

"Didn't I say you'd be the only man not wearing a bow tie?"

"I've been promoted from barbarian pillager to management. Do you know how to tie a neck tie?"

A man trying to decide which tie he should put on.

'He wears a necktie like he means it.'

"It's bedtime, Roger. Loosen your tie."

Operation Father's Day

'Fortunately I'm a big guy.'

'At least we don't have to worry about getting those as gifts.'

Nice tie, Al - hand it over."

'No collar, no din-din,' said Mrs. Flint firmly. 'Omigosh,' thought Larry, 'Fifi will never give it back!'

'You know Solomon, I just keep feeling that something isn't quite right today.'

'And once again it's ended in a tie.'

"Ever since I said I liked creative ties, things have gotten out of hand around here."

'This convention lacks just one thing...name tags.'

Antiques/Collectible/Bric-A-Brac/Garbage.

'Herbie dear, why can't you ever forget the office?!'

'Name tag's up here, Ma'am - I'm from the Cattlemen's Delegation.

"Is it just me or does the dog seem calmer since you got it that new collar?"

'Throw it out? It's worth more! That's $27 worth of wine spilled onto a $12 tie.'