National No Housework Day Gifts

Happy National No Housework Day

"We're keeping you overnight because the nurses love you!"

Keyworker

'Would you be interested in attending a stress management seminar?'

A businesswoman's desk breaks under the weight of the 'in' pile

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

'It's not easy being fabulous and caretaking.'

"She's the best nit nurse this school has ever seen."

'She's one of our nurses hiding from the patient load.'

'My goodness, how many miricle drugs did they give you?'

'Still no improvement? Nurse, attach more gizmos.'

Nurse's introduction training - "We don't get the quality of student we used to"

The Month of July

recycling

Orthopedics. Pediatrics. Stuff they never taught your in nursing school.

"Now, now, now, it can't be THAT bad."

'Get this, Dr. Melroy just asked my opinion.'

The Crimean War and Florence Nightingale

"For the glory of God Almighty, and in the names of the munificent King and munificent Queen of Spain, I do on a day—either a Friday preceding or a Monday directly following a weekend that is earlyish in but toward the middle of October—in this year of our Lord, 1492, claim this land."

"We need volunteers for the car chasing fund raiser."

When pedants take a break.

"Nurse, I said 'boil' the instruments, not 'fry' the instruments."

"But first, our national anthem."

'You're very tense today.'

"Safe? Of course it's safe! I do fireworks every year!"

'He still doesn't know how serious an amputation he's had, nurse, so try not to act too shocked.'

Doctor organises medical documents into 'poked' and 'prodded' piles.

Workaholism is a disease. It can be cured.

On the Seventh Day

'I just need you to make notes on the chart, so that I know the patient is breathing and all.'

Nurses make it better.

"Do you want a democracy where every vote counts or where we count every vote?"

"There...that chair, hidden by the plants...that's my secret happy place."

Inner calm.

"That's against the rules...."