Nameplate Enthusiast T-Shirts

Robert Redford (Just Kidding!).

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

'Instead of a raise, Yomp, you may call me 'Chief', instead of Mr Staghorn.'

"His name is James Tom Dave Jon Lee Robert Glenn Joseph Tony Sam Barnes. We didn't want to hurt any relatives' feelings by not naming him after them."

'I've drawn up a shortlist of baby names.'

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

"Are you the one they call El Cóndor?"

Baptism Then and Now

'And though he died during the hunt, we can only assume that George L Jones would want this new species of butt-faced clown monkey to forever bear his name.'

"I got my PhD in Nursing just so people would have to call me Doctor."

"...and you call yourself a computational immunotox-pharmacological an-diffracctiion bimolecular therapeutic ononclonal-antibody genomic metabolic-endocrinologist."

Naming that Impala

Tom Cruise

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

All day I design high tech communication devices...yet at a party I'm lost without name tags.

'Then again, who says we can't call it a mangelwurzel?'

"Really? 'Yeller'? That's what you want to name him?"

Books: Names That Will Make Your Child Hate You!

'I know you can make this project go. That's why I call you 'The Magic Motor'.'

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"

1,001 names to Embarrass Your Child for Life.

Proof you've made it Loud Annoying The voices raised against you

Mr Long and Miss Short.

'For the sake of convenience everybody just calls me Joe.'

Changing house name.

"One of you will be Kevin, one will be Kev and one will be K. You decide who."

'Therefore I do christen this child 'Isyouis Oris You Ain't.''

"And remember, we're a multi-denominational church - we accept fiver, tenner, euros, dollars. . ."

Margaret...Meatball

"Some people call me a ball-buster, but I prefer cojones-crusher."

A word to the wise. At this morning's meeting you were referred to as the 'the bottleneck'.