Mythical Storytelling Fan T-Shirts

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

"Hey, it's not all fire and brimstone anymore—one of our nine circles is even smoke-free."

Swiss army knife

The Beer Garden of Eden: "This hard cider is life-changing. Try a sip."

No time for sirtaki now, Greece!

"You have to declare what you rob from the rich, but you can deduct what you give to the poor."

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

Hot Tub Frosty

'Now that's what I call a really old tree!'

"And make sure you get my daughter home before sunrise..!"

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

"Sorry Darling, you are fabulous, but I'm searching for MY Prince too!"

'No, I won't be celebrating St George's Day.'

Paul Bunyan gets the leg-lengthening Operation

Going Down?

Adam and Eve, as old people.

"Underwater Childbirth Ward."

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

"It's creepy thinking that Santa can sneak into my house undetected. I must find out how he does it!"

"So do you still think 'rising sea levels' is a bunch of baloney?"

"He's So Your Type."

Europa takes a selfie

"That's weird. The app says to look for a Nissan Sentra."

"Um, latest update Noah: the Warrumwarbler is now extinct."

Viking River Raids

"At long last, Wyatt, our dream has come true and we are within reach of the legendary toast fields of the Sierra Madre."

"I dropped my goblet!"

Diver finds Davy Jones' locker.

HOLY LAND INSURANCE CO. , 'Darn you, Methuselah! -- You've completely

"Archaeologists discovered several enormous ancient cities buried under the jungles of Cambodia. That means the Khmer civilization was the largest empire on Earth from the 9th to the 12th centuries. That changes everything about our conception of the Middle Ages. What was your conception of the Middle Ages? Well... it was... well, knights, maidens, dragons... mostly dragons. And elves."

Centaur falls in love.

'Careful, the plate is really hot.'