Mystical Rituals Fan T-Shirts

"Can you cleanse the space of all the roach and mice spirits?"

"I'm having my entrails read."

Bob woke up in a pile of notes, some scrawled so quickly that no one could decode them. He remembered nothing of the night before, except... yes, a fleeting glimpse of the writer's moon.

"I'm referring you to an old gypsy woman."

Wotan with eye patch

'I guess I don't need to tell you that you got the job.'

"It might be time to put you on a stronger anti-inflammatory."

A couple lie in bed

"Yes, I see where you left your phone."

Your karma will catch up with you!

"You choose now to suddenly become romantic?"

"This computer uses artificial intelligence to think like a human being...so it needs coffee in the morning to get it going!"

Devil paints God.

"Here you are darling...breakfast in bed"

"Dr. Rheinschreiber never does an appendectomy without music and dancing."

Your dinner is in the coven.

"I kind of miss that morning newspaper you used to hold in front of your face."

Bath Time

'Fortune cookies aren't fun for me. I always know my fortune in advance.'

A praying mantis bride throws her husband's head to a crowd of wedding guests.

"I swear, the solstice starts earlier every year."

'I see you haven't paid me yet!'

"You have a strong interest in sports."

"Madam Zelda passed to the other side last week. Would you want me to get a message to her?"

''Intelligent design'? -- Why, those patronizing little twerps!'

'Your wife says she's been watching you, and there are a lot of things you need to work on.'

"Rock, paper or scissors?"

"I look forward to coming here for great tasting coffee every morning... but you are talking so loud I can't even smell it!"

'May I recommend the house blend?'

'Stay out of electric storms.'

Wife firing toast at husband.

"Seriously? You want to challenge me now? Can't you at least wait until I've finished my morning coffee and today's newspaper?"