Mystical Forecaster T-Shirts

"An early spring was just a prediction- I can't actually control the weather!"

"Something will fall down from the sky and it will be the end of the world - just because you didn't eat all of your carrion for lunch, my boy!"

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

"We apparently exceeded our expectations but, do any of you remember what they were?"

'You're a water sign and I'm an earth sign. . .Together we're mud.'

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

'My father carried this sign before me, as did his father before him.'

"Beware of start-ups with a negative cash flow."

Forecasters are two a penny. Supply exceeds demand.

"Someday a real rain will come and wash all the scum off the street. But today, expect occasional sprinkles."

"And then yesterday, I had an epiphany: The best way for me to overcome my paralyzing fear of a global ecological/economic collapse is to find a way to turn it into a lucrative career!"

"Hear me, for the Lord has given me an exclusive."

Poll: The World Will End With: Nuclear War, Global Warming, Assault Weapons.

Shakespearean Actor

Fortune teller has a diary for 2017

"Johnson's our head of forecasting, he alos works part-time as a successful science fiction writer."

"That's because supply exceeds demand."

'...George isn't in right now, but you can email him at...'

'The mist is clearing.'

Psychic: Palm reading, tarot, and lost and found.

"Ok, get the 09:30 to Manchester... change for the 11:25 to Preston.. then catch the 12:15..."

"I see a vague figure of someone groping...groping...groping..Yes, yes, it's coming in more clearly now! It seems to be—yes, it is a man! The man has a briefcase! And some papers! The man is an economist!"

"It's a bit of a scam. They sell the crystal ball at cost, then nail you on the price of replacement psych-ink cartridges."

'Hey! The audience wants you to stop sending spam thoughts!'

"Great first quarter guys but I'm a little concerned about the future."

"Lunch Thursday at one? Looks good to me."

"I'd say, psychotic-obsessive -- but I happen to know he's a top-level economist."

Managing the NHS budget

"It's a message for you from the other side."

"It's empty back there, skipper, a large group of clairvoyants cancelled at the last minute."

"The village shaman said if we stay on this path, we can’t miss the Walmart."

"I need the answers to tomorrow's history test."

70 chance of returning in 45 min.

Madam Zaza sees your future.