Mystic Wonderer Gifts

"Where do you see me in five years?"

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

'But what is the universe for?'

"Little help?"

"I'm not sure you'll want to know this."

'Wow, this guy is DEEP.'

'I wish I was creative'

Sleeping Beauty

'Maybe he has some sort of mystic attachment to the soil.'

"Something goes around something, but that's as far as I've got."

How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.

"Take the picture, dam it, take the picture!"

"Sorry kids, wrong house. This one is made of vegetables."

'If I want to live happily ever after, grandma, do I have to marry a princess?'

"Joyce! The poltergeist are having another dinner party!"

'I predict that the next big trend will be spontaneous non-existence.'

OM, SWEET OM

"Dad, tell us a scary meteorite story."

'Naughty? Nice? Santa, I don't deal in absolutes.'

Musical Pipe

"Ding dong means the witch is dead. Ding ding means dinner is ready."

'Oh wise one - what is the secret to long life?'

Cleaner being carried away on a magic carpet.

'Uh, are you sure you can handle enlightenment?'

God's studio assistants

"I'll be right back."

'The spirit of Miss Tiger Lilly couldn't come this week!'

'He's not there at the moment so please leave a message.'

''Willie the Wizard' gets out next week -- get ready to change all the locks.'

Camelot Arms Fair

Don Quichotte's shadow

The Paranormal Society...

Archeologists found a set of 9.7-million-year-old teeth in Germany that might belong to a primitive relative of early man. Totally unrelated question: Are you missing any teeth, Sadie. That's funny. Speaking of which, there are many ways a person could lose teeth. Threats of violence aren't funny in 2018. That's like a rule. A good pummeling never hurt anyone.

"... And I think you should apologise to that palm reader for scoffing at her predictions."

"Good lord, we found the queen!"