Mystery Novel Aficionado Gifts

'Due to cutbacks, we've removed the last 20 pages from every mystery novel.'

Man sees book flying in the Mystery section.

'God, how I hate bent coppers.'

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

"Meet The Author"

Victor Hugo

Thomas Mann.

Nathaniel Hawthorne

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

The Dorrie Decimal System

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Television Readers.

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'Mysteries' section of bookshop reveals secret door.

Silence of the Chickens...

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

The First Draft. . . Moby Duck.

Characters jumping out of a book.

Stephen Spender.

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

"Quoth the raven, 'Nevermore.'"

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

Gunter Grass

'Don't worry, you're safe. I started my diet today.'

'Is that where you keep the banned books?'

Iris Murdoch

The Shed Mystery: 'Ah! There you are! Ok, that's enough...time to go ho...uh...wait...what the...?'

The Department of Mystery - No one really knows who we are or what we do, including us.

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

Günter Grass

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

"If I Can Make One Critic Smile..."