Musician With A Sense Of Humor Pillows

'Which piece are you going to play?' - 'The Minute Waltz' - '1 minute 9 seconds. Fail.' - 'Damn you, Chopin!'

'Since my baby left me, I found a new place to dwell. It's not in the pie or the baby's prunes - it's on 'Heartbreak Motel' Oh baby, so lonely...'

'Maybe they burned Rome to the ground just because Nero's playing was so bad?'

"Canadian Mt. ‘Rush’more"

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

Bad Timbre: the world's first Garage Philharmonic Orchestra

"This next one is my own quirky rendition of Berlioz's 'Symphonie Fantastique,' Movement 5, 'Dream of a Witches' Sabbath.'"

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"

"I was going to play the Moonlight Sonata, but I forgot the key."

Radiator jazz player

"Not now, my love. I'm feeling preminstrel."

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

Elevator Music

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

"I thought it would be appropriate to have a band playing as we went down."

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

The Phantom Of The Garden

"They'll be expecting adagio. Go with the allegro."

Opera singer singing to her partner who is wearing a gas mask on due to her bad breath.

Guitar pickin'

Pay me not to pay 'Wonderwall'

"Good lord, Billingsworth. You've stumbled onto the legendary Lepidopterist Graveyard."

Double Saxophone

'PHWOAR! You should have seen her rear end when she sat on the piano. . . played 'TINK' and 'BOOM' at the same time!'

Fuzz - Fuzzy writes a song with a positive message.

"Who is 'coming around the mountain,' John? Could it be your mother?"

Waiter in resturant sawing violin.

Rap-scallions

"Beans, Them Beans, Them Beans, Beans, Beans..."

Edward Elgar.

All Les's dreams of stardom were coming true, and he'd only played one note.

"If there is a heaven, why do we end up as fossil fuel?"

Dr. Phil takes it home.

"Ding" "Dong"

'Never mind singing it in rap...a simple 'I do' will suffice.''