Musical Wildlife Whisperer T-Shirts

'A little long on the tremolo, perhaps, and not enough obligatto, but all things considered, not a bad call.'

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Polly txt speak

'What motivated you to become a environmentalist?'

Children's Parties

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"Quick, start the car!"

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

Dog Dreams

If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

Boy with a whale: 'He followed me home, Dad, can I keep him?'

'Don't bite it.I have to check Daddy next.'

'You know too much!'

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

Two old superheroes on a park bench feeding the birds.

"That is an outrageous slur."

"...and that growl has turned many a hunter into vegetarians!"

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"

"This never happened."

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"

'Humans are so considerate: They put perches like these for us on every one of their houses...'

"Ed's tree hugging was out of control."