Music Industry Professionals Gifts

The problem is, these free music downloads on the internet are killing the Siberian kazoo folk-pop trio industry.

'Yes, we've found a way to make teenagers pay for music on the Internet. Unfortunately, it also kills them.'

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

"We need to sue, claiming free speech is being violated by remotes with fast forward buttons."

"I love being your agent, Nick, but the guys making the really big bucks now are the managers. Let me be your manager."

George Martin

The GODFATHER Ride 25¢

Sid Sinatra.

Derek and Clive (Dudley Moore and Peter Cook).

"If you get married at the Grammy Awards, can your marriage be annulled at the Country Music Awards?"

The First 3-D Thanksgiving

"This next song is about narrow-minded record executives and their reluctance to take a chance on anything a bit different."

'Dubble Dawawg A.K.A. Diplo Matt A.K.A. Spyral A.K.A. Sheldon delman - noted rap artist'

'Yeah, a lot of people say I look like Elvis. I think it's my eyes.'

"I'm thinking action roles might not really be your thing."

'The Final Merger'

"We interrupt this rubbish to give you another chance to switch off."

'Our ratings are down. Let's blame it on the media.'

"Coming up... more of the same mindless pop songs with repetitive lyrics and nauseating melodies!"

Trump commissions song

"Kanye's changing his name. I'm thinking he should go by Cra Z."

This next number is when we smash our guitars...

Actors getting married. 'Best supporting man'

"I can sleep late, but, as his agent, I still get ten percent of the worm."

'And who are you wearing?'

"I just sold my entire back catalogue of songs for $185 million."

Note to self: Call lawyer, ask if he has any experience with charges of treason. What's lawyer got to do … got to do with it … What? What are you doing? Tina Turner. My second favorite singer, after Clay Aiken. She's amazing. I investigated every single one of her concerts. Good times. Wanna see my Tina Turner tattoo? I'm not a Russian spy!! What is this, 1985?! Good year. Tina was in "Mad Max" that year.

"When you said you were high up in the the music business..."

"In this business the ball takes funny bounces. I got you a recording contract."

"Remember, Kimberly, I'm more than your agent. I'm your mother."

'The music business.'

"Can you perform under pressure?"

'Are you okay, Bill?'

'You look and sound like a real pro.'