Museum Visit Gifts

Easter Island Secret

On a school trip to a museum, a child takes the head of a horse statue and runs through the museum with it.

A woman listening to an audio guide

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

You're my Mona Lisa.

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

At the Museum

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

Paul Klee

"I think he was a celebrity."

The Googler

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

Culture Saturday

Party Animals.

'That's about it so far, Son.'

"You're on a what?!"

'Of all the nerve!...Making us sit through the whole of their Bayeux Tapestries!!'

"Well....I could've done this!"

"Why don't you find a museum!"

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"Personally, I'm a doer."

'They look more up to date than the ones in your tool-box.'

'Are you sure this is authentic ancient Indian art?'

"Me? How about you go closer and read the plaque!"

Science Museum. Why are you skeptical about the things scientists say? Because they claim the universe is expanding but when I visited my childhood hometown, everything was smaller.

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

Fertility goddess. Nanny goddess.

Sci-Fi Museum. New Exhibit. H.G. Wells War of the Worlds. In 1938, Orson Welles broadcast "War of the Worlds," a radio drama about aliens from Mars invading earth. The radio drama was presented as a series of fake news reports about devastation caused by the invading aliens. Many listeners turned in to the program mid-roadcast and thought the news reports were real. Widespread panic ensued. Wow! Orson Welles caused all that panic with a radio program. Just imagine what he could have don

Couple Sitting in Front of A Sunset.

'I could do that.'

'No, Timmy, we are not supposed to connect them.'

'I can make out the nude, but I don't see the submarine.'

They don't feed the animals in here very well, do they!

'Evidently, one of them was a cartoonist!'