Mundane Humor Enthusiast Gifts

"If anyone calls, marge, I'm sitting right by the phone."

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

Police Feline Unit

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

Selling lemon latt�

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Speed Dating for Turtles

Do Not Resuscitate

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

Faster, Georges, faster!

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

Cariactures

'Cannonball!'

Here and There Trays

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

Ancient Landmarks of New York City