Mr. Darcy Fans Gifts

Cut out and keep your own Mr Darcy!

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

'I went to my boss and demanded the fruits of my labor. He gave me a Blackberry.'

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

"...No it does state here quite clearly...the right to bear arms...not arm bears."

End the Winter Blues

"'How We Die' - fabulous!"

'Item 56, we need to schedule a series of meetings to discuss whether we should have meeting to look at whether we're having too many meetings.'

"You calm down."

The loving, yet vengeful God of Cheshire!

"I'd like to see you do this online."

Greed.

Conspiracy Theory Bookstore: JFK, Princess Di, and Osama Bin Laden.

I Pagliacci

Telekinetics on strike...

Sure, it helps to be a blood-sucking parasite, but that's not all it takes to be a stockbroker...

"Of course I'm going to give him a tip - he should take lessons!"

"Don't worry, Emily. . . I'm woke and you're woke, so I'm sure our baby will turn out woke!"

You dope! Why would you build our home right next to a power plant?

'Ants of all lands, unite!'

"Is your dog friendly?"

"I never actually said I was spiderman...I just said that no one has ever seen us in the same room together."

"So, how's your scary movie?"

'Oh, honey, what a lovely house... We'll place the couch here, the cupboard there and my psychiatrist right here!'

'So, then.... you don't LIKE life in the fast lane?'

Rudy Park Enterprises regrets to announce the end to a brief experiment aimed at combining the popular and irrepressible talk show phenomenon Sadie Cohen with a background beat of powerful and thrilling house music. In fact, our ratings soared during our experiment. Revenue shot up 17.5 percent. Advertisers loved it. Our decision to cancel the experiment in no way reflects any error of management. Rather, it was a raging success reflective of our forward thinking management. In the end, though,

One of Dracula's 'coffin mournings'.

Shawn considered himself a vegetarian by proxy.

People bell ringing - 'RING TONES'

'Dear sir, thank you for your idea of a helicopter ejection-seat, but...'

Before he was taken away, Dr. Stuart Trust was the last known doctor to make HOUSE CALLS.

'No, I don't believe in life after birth. When you're born, you're born!'

"This is a ritzy ski report - it's all fake snow."

Man brushing the teeth of his reflection.

Happy Birthday to you... Thanks guys!