Moving To Third Grade Gifts

'You better help me while you can, dad. Next year I'll be in third grade.'

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

'Are you sure I should read my book report to the class? --�It's PG-13.'

Cheers For The Hollyhock Middle School Chess Team

You wrote a book report on a video game instruction manual?

Child's Drawing (With Elephantiasis)

" 'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' a treatment by Todd Mozelle, Grade Three."

"I lost my taste for his homework when it came burned on a CD."

"If wisdom comes with age, what are we doing here at eight and a half?"

'Your report card grades are poor. Maybe you should stop building model airplanes. The glue is getting to you.'

"The first day of school. Yes sir. A day to make new friends. A day to mark new beginnings. A day to discover everyone but you has grown three feet over the summer."

Child in a bear suit.

"In pre-school I was an overachiever. Now, in first grade, math is threatening my reputation."

"This is my last day. My parents found a more expensive school on the East Side."

"Rats, I thought he'd like my science project!"

'Due to the record snowfall, every school on the face of the earth is closed except for Wolfbranch Elementary.'

'How could you flunk multiplication?'

"They grow up so quickly. It seems like only yesterday that he was in the third grade. Wait, it was yesterday!"

"The problem with online schooling is I can't get help from Mom and Dad!"

'No animals were killed during the making of this book report....'

They were right. Life did get better after middle school.

"I didn't learn anything in school today but I'll learn twice as much tomorrow."

"I attribute most of my problems in the third grade to the media."

'Do I have to enter a plea?'

'Talk about being scared straight...I just found out that being held back a grade is not an urban myth.'

"I've got all the rooms in my GPS so I won't get lost."

"It was a professional hit..."

'I guess my love for Miss Rogers is over...I passed third grade.'

"Why are they called freshers when they only eat processed food?"

"Listen kid, you may have been a big man on playground."

"I know there are a few things I don't understand, but second grade should take care of that."

Anyhow, thanks for listening, Rudy. It's part of the job. I guess you're right: the move to 3rd grade is a big one. There are lots of changes. You've just got to roll with it. And buy a new video game console? It eases any transition. How did you get to be so smart? Playing lots of video games.

'Holly, listen to me. This school year is important. . . It's your last year before high school! You have to prepare! High school is a whole new ball game.'

'I'll never get out of the third grade -- They keep raising the retirement age.'