Moving Into A New House With Partner Gifts

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

Let's get organized

Domestic Superheroes!!

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

LAY ZEE FUK

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

Painting by the numbers for adults

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

Doing the borders.

Second hand furniture.

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

"Man's best friends."

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

Lazy Octopus

Yardless: Please help

"I'm thinking of turning this home office into a man-cubicle."

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'