Movie Quipster T-Shirts

'Did you watch the horror movie?'

Herman Mankiewicz

Marilyn Monroe - Spot the Difference

"You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the heck else are you talking... you talking to me?"

Man cutting hedge next to two heads impaled on sticks. Signs beneath say 'You missed a bit' and 'You can do mine next'.

"All dishes marked with an asterisk are served with sarcasm. . ."

'Is the water cold?'

Official Seal

"You asked to see me, boss?" "Yes, Rudy. We have a serious problem here." "I'm going to need you to stop humming the 'Star Wars' theme 24/7." "Disney is notoriously litigious. If they catch wind that you're publicly performing the theme, they may sue the cafe for royalties." "Daaaa... daaaa... duh-duh-duh daaaaaaa... daaaa... duh-duh-duh... wait, what?" "If you cost me my livelihood, I'll do to you what Han did to that Tauntaun."

"Wife and two hernias to support!"

'I hope he didn't write the menu.' (Pub quizzers comment on poor grammar)

"E.T. phone home... Now!"

'To cure your dog I suggest you change your aftershave lotion, Mr Lutshbuddle.'

'I got 50p - how much did you get?'

"You were never in The Birds..."

"But we had stir-fry last night and the night before."

"I know what you're thinking: Did he order six eggs or only five. You've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do you, waiter?" "He's so not making my day." When Dirty Harry Met Sally

"Who's the actress that's married to the guy who was in that movie about cops with the actor who starred with the woman in that TV show about doctors?"

No one bleats about fleece club!

"Don't you know what happens to the naive blonde who goes into the dark cellar? Have you not read the script?"

Cult films!

"Edward Shovelhands"

"That reminds me of a scene from 'The Big Lebowski.'"

Never mind the Bartoks.

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: Apples, Oranges and Lemmons

'Dill! Stop being a freakish modern day cow-relic chewing throwback! Ok?'

Man Eater