Movie Industry Professionals Gifts

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

"OK, stop me if you've never heard this before!"

"We can stop entertaining ourselves now, Ian."

"I love being your agent, Nick, but the guys making the really big bucks now are the managers. Let me be your manager."

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

Tom Hanks

"We need to sue, claiming free speech is being violated by remotes with fast forward buttons."

"If you get married at the Grammy Awards, can your marriage be annulled at the Country Music Awards?"

The GODFATHER Ride 25¢

'And the Award goes to...Ewww...him?'

Hollywood Breakup

Talent, pluck, or plain dumb luck?

'We don't know what the final result will look like, but the movie rights have already been optioned.'

"Bob, you're just not selling me on you essential hamburgerness."

"Jessica has an idea about going to the beach that she'd like to pitch you."

"I had that dream again where you're writing down all my fears and anxieties and working them into a screenplay."

The First 3-D Thanksgiving

"I'm thinking action roles might not really be your thing."

"Face it - in this town, either you're a star or you're just another brown dwarf."

"I'd like to thank my family, but, to be honest, I'm pretty sure I could've done it without them."

Hollywood or bust!

Welcome to Hollywood

'The Final Merger'

"We interrupt this rubbish to give you another chance to switch off."

'Our ratings are down. Let's blame it on the media.'

Casting Director

Trump commissions song

Restraining orders from the stars.