Movie Industry Maverick Gifts

"If you want the part you're gonna have to take off your shirt, toots. There's a reason it's called show business."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

Working in the Hazard Zone!

'At Tesmer holdings, we don't break the rules! We change them!'

"OK, stop me if you've never heard this before!"

Tom Hanks

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

"Stick Figure" "Stick Figure II" "Stick Figures" "Stick Figure: The Reawakening"

'Excellent job, Fenwick, especially the part where you employ Magic Realism to fudge third-quarter earnings!'

Talent, pluck, or plain dumb luck?

Hollywood Breakup

'And the Award goes to...Ewww...him?'

Remember . . . If at first you do succeed, make sequels!'

"Jessica has an idea about going to the beach that she'd like to pitch you."

"Face it - in this town, either you're a star or you're just another brown dwarf."

'I told you, if the LA branch steals our thunder, there is no more dialogue.'

"Hang on! - we've possibly go another couple of films left in here!!"

"I had that dream again where you're writing down all my fears and anxieties and working them into a screenplay."

Hollywood or bust!

"I'd like to thank my family, but, to be honest, I'm pretty sure I could've done it without them."

Lord of the Rings IV.

Welcome to Hollywood

'This is where we shed all our inhibitions.'

"Wow! Boss! I thought she was a silent partner."

Jennifer Lawrence

Melanie Griffith

"He's the exception: a fly on the wall who made it big in blockbuster movies."

"So your agent doesn't like your lawyer, and your PlR. people don't like your manager. They all like you."

When stars marry: 'Why did you ask him first? Does he have top billing?'

"He thinks that if they really want to smash the stereotype then he should be a shoe-in for the next Bond."

"If small stars keep planets in line, what do big stars do?"

"A P.R. Intern Named Salome with the Head Shot of John the Client."

'I'd trust you anywhere - I think!'

Restraining orders from the stars.