Movie Collecting Gifts

'One good thing about memory-loss is that you can watch your favourite film as often as you like and still not remember how it ends. . .'

"It's the press. They want to know if you have anything to say about the sexual harassment charges being levied against you."

"Ah, Mr Connery. I've been expecting you."

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

Benedict Cumberbatch

Scene from 'Night of the Koala'

'Breaking Bad' Box Set Addiction.

"I hope you don't mind leftovers."

DVD extras - the making of the boxed set.

Tom Hanks

"Hold it a second. I want to watch this."

'This snuff video you sold me just shows people taking snuff.'

'I hope this DVD has some worthwhile in-front-of-the-scenes content.'

After selling his life story, with movie and merchandising rights, Zorro had a new mark.

"I picked up an exorcize DVD by mistake."

Robert Mitchum

Now showing, the Monster from Space.

Gene Tierney caricature

'Mr. Kong?'

John Wayne

"Arr! Why is the quality of all me DVDs so crappy?"

A general points out his ribbons which signify films he has watched.

Clark Gable.

Successful killers use gas powered chainsaws only.

'Can I have a refund if she puts the weight back on.'

The Lone Ranger receives a disconcerting smoke signal from Tonto....

Johnny Depp

'Really? I was an extra in several John Wayne movies too...'

Charlie Chaplin

W.C.Fields

Marlon Brando

'Johnny Depp'

Then and now: great readers are now great viewers.

Mother tells son, who is watching DVDs: 'No, I don't think we need a 'national debate' on the issue of bedtime.'

Ernest Borgnine