Mother Moving In T-Shirts

'Just how long does your mother plan on staying with us?'

Now just because mother has moved in, I don't want you two fighting over who runs the kitchen!

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

Domestic Superheroes!!

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

LAY ZEE FUK

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

"Man's best friends."

"I'm thinking of turning this home office into a man-cubicle."

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

Cat Towels

Painting the Ceiling

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

"You've changed."

'They make remarkably clean pets.'

'Homepage Sweet Homepage'

"Something went wrong after you inserted tab A into slot B."

"I don't think the turkey's going to be done on time. That's the dishwasher."

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

Housewife feeding her washing machine with a brief.

"I guess opposites do attract. She's a real shaker, and he's such a grind."

"Well, yes, it's not what you would call a practical nest, but my wife insisted on using an architect..."

"I believe I have just reached a whole new level of cozy."

Home Sweet Home

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.