Mortgage Management Pillows

"Murray, I need you to push a little harder on my home sale. I'm starting to get a little under water on my mortgage."

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Profit

Great Chinese Dynasties

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

'I think I know what the problem is!'

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

'It's okay. We'll just push our retirement plan back a bit.'

'As my solicitor I think you could have negotiated that better.'

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

"When I was young my parents couldn't afford to give me too much, too soon."

Man pushing Euro sign up a hill.

Department of efficiency and cost analysis.

"Hey, honey, the credit card company increased our debt... I mean our credit limit!"

'Mixed news from the federal reserve...interest rates will drop on savings but will go up on loans.'

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

'The golden eggs are great... but I need you to lay a golden parachute.'

Standard & Poor

'I'll need more than I can spend.'

U.S. Credit Rating

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

"Gee, thanks! What rate of interest does it pay?"

'You reached the Nervous Investor Fund's Hotline. The per share value is now 19.05, now 18.91, now...'

'But I do have fun. I have lots lots of fun. I have lots of fun making money.'

'If we're going to have a banking relationship, you'll have to trust me more than this.'

"I never said they were well-compensated. I just said they were paid handsomely."

'I love it when you talk big bucks, Mr. Williams.'

"The time has come for some tough cost-cutting decisions, and I'm forced to ask myself, do we really need a bass?"

'My piggy bank charged shaking fees.'

"We've decided to diversify our funds on some candy!"

"A man never stands so tall, son, as when he stoops to pick up a quarter."

'In the future, if we're a little late with your allowance, don't just automatically turn it over to a collection agency.'

Counting my Bonus...