Morning Recovery Champion Pillows

"I didn't think this shift was ever going to end, YOU are in for a long day my friend, and water-bottle is going to have to come in early."

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

"I'm so happy to be back in the workforce I'll never complain out loud again about Mondays."

"I hate to sound like a sergeant, Ralph, but it's ten minutes to six."

"It's my 30-day chip. One month catnip free."

He was out in no time, with a new outlook and a clean slate.

'Any chance of getting your alarm clock fixed?

Clive would be lost without his morning heart starter.

"It would keep me awake all night, but I'm up for a game of coffee pong first thing in the morning."

'Getting my children to get out of bed and go to school was hard - So I bought a cattle-prod...'

"Ninety days, catnip-free. I couldn't have done it without you."

"It's thrilling to watch them come out in the morning, ready for the kill!"

In the Days Before Coffee

"I never have a good excuse to be late: The teacher knows my dad wakes me up at dawn..."

'I remember when you were this high!'

"Latte for a guy you're sure ordered after you."

Real Hopscotch: 'A 12-Step Program for the addiction to scotch.'

"I hate a sarcastic cup of coffee."

'All right, all right, I'm getting up.'

'For goodness sake, take a mint: You have Spring breath!'

Mega Corp. Employee Entrance. I like to get to work early, before my brain knows what I'm up to.

"One of you will have to remain behind."

Gamblers Anonymous: 'Betcha I recover before you do.'

"How long have I been typing on a waffle maker."

"Oh, come on—it's 8 a.m. somewhere."

'My husband will be a little late getting to the office, but he's on his way.'

"It's the only way I can get myself out of bed in the morning."

"It's the same thing every Monday morning. Trust me. . . he'll rise to the occasion."

'The alarm didn't go off, my car wouldn't start, missed the bus, my back's aching, haven't had a raise in two years ...'

Rise and shine

"Good! I see they made the coffee nice and strong this morning."

Wind-up Radio

Man wakes to his bedside digital clock which reads: It's Time.

'I'm pleased to announce that Gary has successfully completed the first step of the program!' 'I think that calls for a little drink!'

Probation Officer