Moral Education Pillows

"Well, sure I'd like to instill the values of hard work and discipline, but that takes hard work and discipline."

"I cannot tell a lie. But I'll bet you can."

Ethics exam cheater.

"There may be a moral equivalent of war, but, by God, there is not moral equivalent of money."

"Unfortunately, what you downloaded from the net is a ten-year-old paper I once wrote for my college boyfriend!"

'Idealist'

'Took calcium supplements for years without paying for them.'

"It's my conscience... It's all achy"

"You're six years old and I'm your mother! - I'm SUPPOSED to impose my moral standards on you!"

A happy poor man is given money by a rich man and is no longer happy.

"C’mon, Sara. Like you wouldn’t consider – even for a second – accepting an iPhone from the devil."

'Making virtue its own reward isn't EITHER a cop-out!'

"Boy, the Reverend sure has your number."

"So, while extortion, racketeering, and murder may be bad acts, they don't make you a bad person."

'What you're asking me to do goes against my principles. I'll have to charge extra for that.'

Clerical Training Course - 'Gentlemen, we are here to practise what we preach.'

'It's tough doing what's right when you see what's left.'

Moral Fruit and Fiber Cereal

Decisions a Pope makes

Bothers my conscience a little bit/May keep me up for a night or two/Am I really stooping this low?

"What do you mean, 'There can be no ethics without fear of God'?! Look at me - all ethical and shit!"

The tortoise and hare

Trump Bible photo op

"Naughty? Nice? It's a bit more nuanced than that..."

The Little Engine that Faced a Tough Moral Dilemma.

'Assuming moral absolutes - good dog.'

"We share values, … which is why neither of us has a full set."

Aesop's Fables - The Lion and the Mouse

"You should do a sermon on the dangers of stupidity."

'Do you have any preexisting conditions, like sloth, gluttony, pride, lust...'

Devil vs Angel Duel.

"Look kid, you can't blame everything you do on me."

"Quit whimpering."

"It's a new tally board I've been using. For every random act of kindness I perform, I allow myself three really spiteful acts of nastiness!"

Diogenes: 'I found an honest man once, and he reported me for vagrancy.'