Moody Teen Gifts

Anarchist rebel teenager has eaten all his advent calender chocolates (isn't he naughty).

'Can I have mine with the peak at the front '

"I'm two weeks away from my Pilates badge."

"Maybe you need some kind of app to make it work."

Sex Education Class: "Smirking or non smirking?"

'These are very powerful tranquilizers for when your teen has he horrific tantrums. Take two of them anytime she flares up.'

"He's gonna be bad for business."

'Awesome!'

Suddenly...puberty hit Irwin!

"Sure I'm Alfred the Great now, but in high school I couldn't get a date."

Sally and her fashionista friends get to me. Save our mall! Ignore them! Let's take your mind off them. Don't even think it! I know. Going shopping would be wring. Does ordering online count.

Gotta babysit. Too bad! Tap tap. The worst part is the first! Subduing little monsters? Tap tap. No

'Teachers' Dreams.' 'Young man, either you remove your hand from under her sweater or I will remove it your arm.'

"I think I'll be more relaxed once my secondary sex characteristics kick in."

"Our little girl is growing up - this very morning she told me she hates me."

'I think I'm beginning to understand what sex is all about.'

"I'll kiss you later. Catch! I meant catch you later!"

Twig, do you

The school's security staff began to think Fred was deliberately taunting them with his latest body piercing.

For high school guys who are apprehensive about pinning a corsage on their date comes 'Katie Corsage.'

"You're about to enter a semi-autonomous region of this house."

'Yeah, you were creative.'

"I kept dropping my phone and cracking the screen. So, my parents bought me a thicker cover."

'Is this one of those times that I'm supposed to hold your hand or disappear?'

'I know a trap when I see one.'

"Baldo, I'm sorry! Tia Carmen's friend Maria left this book here by accident. Silly me, I thought it was yours! Ha ha ha!"

Why must you have "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry" on the jukebox? A lot of people complained that "Happy Hour" was too happy.

'What will those kids be wearing next?'

"So let me get this straight...the equality movement has basically doubled the number of crazy high school kids who secretly decorate cars in the middle of the night?"

"Don't worry your daughter is fine. She's just crabby as hell, and I don't want it to spread."

Girl refusing a boy's advances.

As long as my pants hold up, I'll be fine.

"Now that I've quit hating girls, I 've got pimples."

"Cheer up. Your dad had so many pimples in high school, we played connect-the-dots on his yearbook photo."

First Principle of Human Crankiness