Awkward Teen Gifts

Girl refusing a boy's advances.

"So...you're Estella. I don't see how this is gonna work! You really don't have much of a personality!"

The Teen Years of A Red Delicious.

'This test doesn't understand me.'

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

Sex Education Class: "Smirking or non smirking?"

Great job on the color! Thanks. It looks totally natural. Hi, Twig! Hey. Success! She didn't notice. "Mom dyed her hair with Gatorade."

"No surgery. I'm just trying to hide a pimple."

"I didn't raise my hand. I was just stretching."

'Awesome!'

Essay Paper.

Physics 101. An object in motion remaining in motion is an example of what law? Easy come, easy go!

High school sophomore Kyle Rimnard tests his theory that cafeteria meatloaf cures acne.

"Sure I'm Alfred the Great now, but in high school I couldn't get a date."

"I'm deleting history so there will be nothing to study for tomorrow's history test."

'My Social Worker said SOCIETY is to blame for my loutish behaviour, which came as an enormous relief to me.'

'I think I'm beginning to understand what sex is all about.'

'Vocabulary doesn't seem that hard 'til you start trying to use it on girls.'

"This zit is growing way out of control!"

"I'll kiss you later. Catch! I meant catch you later!"

Teddy, do you know why I'm here? Want to, umm, ask me anything? So! That wraps it up! How did your "birds and bees" talk go? I answered all his questions.

'I'm always pleased to meet my daughters college friends Alan. I hear you're studying alternative medicine? Reiki or acupuncture?'

'We all do a lot of stupid things when we're young. So, what'll take to remove that 'Butterball' tattoo?'

'It's probably a hormonal thing.'

'Yeah, you were creative.'

For high school guys who are apprehensive about pinning a corsage on their date comes 'Katie Corsage.'

'If you think you're going to sit around here while I wait on you hand and big foot, think again young man.'

Our poor daughter doesn't have a prom date. Mo-om! I'm going with a group, of friends. No one "dates." Then I don't need a shotgun? Da-ad! I'll never get a boyfriend! Good. I heard that.

Lawn mower breaking kit

'Have you ever considered I may not be cut out to be a student?'

"So let me get this straight...the equality movement has basically doubled the number of crazy high school kids who secretly decorate cars in the middle of the night?"

"That growth spurt I was waiting for didn't quite turn out the way I'd hoped."

That was an excerpt. To read the rest of "What Miranda Hall Did on Her Summer Vacation", you'll have to visit my blog.

SEX EDUCATION, 'Believe me, you don't WANT to know!'

'I can't write legibly... then my teacher would find out I can't spell.'