Monument Buff T-Shirts

National Pigeon Monument (poos on someone's head).

Tripled his reading speed with no loss in comprehension.

The Stat-ewe of Liberty.

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

'You've made a powerful enemy'

Wicca Heritage Centre: Hansel and Gretel stayed here.

'Research shows that while the number of surfers is somewhat constant over the year, there is a sudden increase in casual bathers over Summer...'

"I can hear the sea boiling."

Football Sculpture.

Vincent Van Goth.

A tour guide speaks in hieroglyphs,

Planner at work.

Despite his perfect 'Poker Face'. the others always seemed to know when Toby had a good hand...

'Gee... Nothing says 'I'm dead' like a severed head.'

'We can't take off yet, Madame!'

Percentage artwork

Dinosaur skeleton with a cocktail glass.

Restored antique carriage in A.D. 2500

'That's so I wont forget my wife's birthday.'

'I never forget a face.'

'I've always wanted to enter the Turner Prize.' - 'Burp!' - 'Okay, great. Now I just need a title...'

A monument gets down from his plinth.

'This was to have been Hillary's greatest moment...'

'Is this seat saved?' Fundamentalism Gone Awry.

'I can't remember the last time I treated a case of amnesia, and I can't even remember if I ever did treat one.'

'You'd forget your head if it wasn't screwed on.'

'It's a variation of the South Beach diet -- we bury you in the sand till you lose fifty pounds.'

An angel spinning the Vitruvian Man

"It's elephants who never forget. Elephant seals forget all the time."

Lifeguard... Lifetime funds manager

"Museum directory: Male statues with big d**ks. Female statues with huge tits & fat butts."

I'm thinking that for our first date, we should go to the "please touch" museum

"He's got a photographic memory."

'I've been treating you for months -- Has your memory shown ANY improvement?', 'Who wants to know?'

Band called ALL SORTS REALLY: 'This way, whenever someone is asked what music they like, we get a free plug.'