Money Management Enthusiast Gifts

EZ Loan - Thumbs Down.

'You can claim your dependents on yout tax returns, but not your codependents.'

FINANCIAL COUNSELING, 'My revolving charge account bored itself right into the ground!'

'I've just worked out that the money we saved for a rainy day would now last us for a rainy one hour and twenty minutes!'

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Profit

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

Great Chinese Dynasties

"It creates the illusion of risk but you know you're perfectly safe."

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

Gerry, there are more accurate ways of balancing the petty cash.

Business of Fingerpointing Line Art

"I think I just solved my cash flow problem."

'I think I know what the problem is!'

Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)

'It's okay. We'll just push our retirement plan back a bit.'

'The bad news is it's all our client's money.'

Warning that Inflationary Policies Could Lead to Crash on Wall St

'We are entering an era of thrift, so in place of champagne and canapes, there will be a jumble sale.'

'A short economics test - if you bought something for

"When I was young my parents couldn't afford to give me too much, too soon."

I love it when you speak Wall Streetese. Say 'to the upside' for me.

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind and cashflow."

"They've made these fund prospectuses much easier to read." Brochure states; 'Give us all your money and get lost."

Hedge fund sharks attacking 'The Markets' ship.

Man pushing Euro sign up a hill.

"Allow me to introduce Recession. Recession is here to stay."

Department of efficiency and cost analysis.

"I was going to tell you it's a jungle out there, but I realize that's probably old news to you."

Fiscal Compass for the Global Investor.

'Mixed news from the federal reserve...interest rates will drop on savings but will go up on loans.'

"Hey, honey, the credit card company increased our debt... I mean our credit limit!"