Mom's Boyfriend T-Shirts

"Mom's new boyfriend wants to take me tropical beach fishing."

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

Shepherd and eurydice

'I sent out for everything.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

You're my Mona Lisa.

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

Killer Executive Suits.

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

Domestic Superheroes!!

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

'On your mark. Get set. Create!'

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

"Talk nerdy to me."

"What's a patent?"

"Stephen and I are today's special."

LAY ZEE FUK

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'