Modern Trends Follower Gifts

"Selfies. That's what I miss most."

Selfies at graduation

"Greetings, I'm the bluebird of dank memes."

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

"Do you do temporary ones that last about two weeks?"

Studies show foods work miracles!

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

"Isn't there an app for this?"

On Aug. 3, 1992, the Moon rose over the horizon wearing heavy eye-liner and mohawk. Fortunately it was just a phase.

"I'll have you know that, '#dirtylitterbox' is trending on Twitter."

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

"That's the trouble with cute kittens - they attract a lot of traffic."

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'

"We're making a video of us watching TV so we can watch ourselves watching TV...later."

"Pumpkin spice has been very good to me."

Final words on gravestones.

'Your parents are way too overprotective.'

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

Giraffe Selfie

'Tech stocks rose on news that nerds are now considered 'hip'.'

"D'you remember caramel before it all became 'salted?'"

"This afternoon, we'll be turning our attention to Guess jeans."

"What are you doing?"

An alternative theory as to why dinosaurs are extinct.

"Not until you've arranged your pillows."

"I've been wondering if there isn't some way we could capitalize on the cat craze."

"Which 'ism' am I this week, Ms. Trotter?"

"My new watch has a G.P.S. function but it always puts me in the right place at the wrong time."

"One man with a mustache is manly. Sexy. Magnetic."

"Great, the end of the world and I'm going to be first on facebook with pictures!!"

"Here we go again, every 30,000 years or so this Paleo diet becomes a fad."

In the not too distant future... "It's a tribal butterfly tramp stamp, honey. Same as yours."

"This isn't working. We have nothing in common."

'Thanks for coming here today for my presentation, '10 cutting edge trends in the future of business analysis.' Copies of my talk will be available in the lobby in VHS and Betamax formats...'