Modern Technology Learner Pillows

"Say that again. I open what? Then click on what? Then type in what? Then save to what. . . ?"

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

"Miss Rogers told me I have a personal 'cloud' to store knowledge in."

'It's one of these new phones that takes photographs.'

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

'When they came up with a 'do your homework' app, then I'll know technology can really make life better.'

"It keeps it out of sight when we're not watching it."

"It says 'beware of robot dog.'"

'Remind me to never again ask him what he learned in school.'

Messenger of the gods in the digital age.

'No need to text me the answer to that. I'm right here.'

"Their technological toys are nothing compared to the power of the supply side."

'Would it make a difference if I told you I was listening to book on audio?'

"Can't fix the WiFi? How times flies! Seems only yesterday you couldn't program the VCR!"

'Father, when are you going to get software for our home computer that will teach me French?'

'Here comes Mr. 'Smarter-then-you'.'

'Where's the mouse for this thing?'

"The Internet puts the world at your finger tips."

Welcome to Kindergarten. It's a list of school supplies -- I need pencils, a ruler, crayons and a laptop!

"We now allow our employees to send their drones in to work for them. It saves them time and money on gas."

"No textbooks. I'm strictly Web-fed."

"One day you'll thank me for embarrassing you in front of the entire Internet."

"It used to be that if you worried about unseen forces you were considered paranoid. Now you're a security expert."

"Good grief, Bradbury! How long have you been working at home?"

'We now feel it's best that baby keeps her security blanket until she's old enough for a cell phone.'

“Okay, Cindy, don’t think of it as learning ... think of it as a software upgrade!”

'Sorry, Big Guy, We're downsizing, Here comes your replacement,'

'You're grounded... not you, the drone.'

Two years ago, during a special episode of the Ask Sadie show, our resident octogenarian asked readers for advice about how she can deal with her midlife crisis. Here is an actual reader letter: Dear Sadie, My son just taught me how to use an iPad, so I am writing to tell you that doing so makes me feel young again. You might want to try it. - Nathaniel from Ontario. Thank you for helping me feel young! I may not be as spry as I was back in the old days ... but at least I've never taken two whol

The Painting Channel

Hi! You want to, like, hang out? Sure. When are you free? Twig! Time to pack. We're leaving!! In about a year? It's on my iCal.

'Pete plays truant, but keeps up with his lessons!'

Modern Studying

'No, no briefcase... FLATSCREEN.'

"I'm on the haywain."