Modern-tech User With A Retro Heart Gifts

'He drives an electric car, reads electronic books and smokes electric cigarettes but he won't move on from his betamax video recorder.'

'Big audio gear is coming back!'

"In the old days, we had to constantly feed the screensaver."

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

The original paperless office

'Someday TVs will be in big boxes on the floor.'

'I don't care what the Hares have. Dial-Up is good enough for us!'

Backlash industries: makers of the macro-chip, bigger, slower..and it even makes mistakes

Before the development of the microchip, attempts to build a laptop computer were largely unsuccessful.

"The new computer is great, but we can't get rid of the old one. It knows too much."

Library Computer Center: Cybrarian

"If I can't use a calculator, may I use my Dad's old slide-rule?"

'As you know, some of us can't keep up with the pace of new technology.'

'Trevor was the first rep at the office to have a portable computer.'

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

'Just as we finally get the industrial revolution down pat, we find ourselves in the middle of the electronic revolution.'

Telephone line ends up buried in the ground with a headstone.

Technological advances within the office.

At last, Clarence thought, the long-awaited return to the old economy had begun.

Man has thrown his computer aside and is writing on a typewriter.

"Goodnight Tommy, sleeptight, watch the millenium bugs don't bite."

"We think your telephone is a great invention, Mr Bell, but is a bit basic. How about adding a phonograph to it?"

'You'd better have a little talk with it - it wants to know where it came from.'

'This may be an old computer, but it won the March Madness office pool again and wants the money deposited in its Swiss bank account.'

Old-fashioned computer

"It's another e-mail from your folks. You know, this would be a whole lot easier if you'd just tell them about the Web."

He still refuses to upgrade.

"Hold my video conferencing calls, Gina."

'I'm worried about that dog's hearing,Doris.'

"One day, son, all this will rule your life too."

"Frank, I need your help. The computers are down, but I was told you know how to multiply two numbers together."

"For a list of the ways artificial intelligence is killing your job, please press one."

"Oh, come on, you know we should have switched to touch-tone years ago."

'Mr. Dobson, you don't have to dictate into the intercom, I'm sitting in the room with you.'

"Don't worry Mac, I'll have that happy face back in no time."