Modern Morality Ponderer T-Shirts

"Facebook VP — you'll be in Circle No. 4."

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

"Call me?"

'Nothing about the evils of corporate downsizing?'

The Price of Freedom

'What I lack in cognitive flexibility, I make up for in moral flexibility.'

"If anything else, it beats bending over!"

"Isn't it true that the prosecution offered you a bone to testify?"

'Just think of one of these as enabling legislation for the golden rule.'

'Thou shall not covet the neighbours same sex partner.'

Truth

'As we all know, the appearance of honesty is the best policy....'

Corruption trial in the Vatican

'Norman really cherishes his ideals.'

Crisis of values

"I love it, the chief loves it, the client loves it, but the gods don't love it."

Surgical Self-Service

30% Heredity, 70% Environment

"I'm basically happy but I'd like a most cost-effective personality."

Biblical Jewish Medical Ethics

"I may have waffled, but I never lip-synched."

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

Bowther, Wilkin, Lynch & Fisk

'Don't tell me this nonsense doesn't violate the code of bioethics.'

'Do everything ethically ... within reason, of course.'

'I imagine you were pretty nervous addressing an army of experts.'

"Sure I know right from wrong. Right is what Mom tell's us to do."

'I used to think I couldn't serve both God and Mammon, and then I discovered multitasking!'

"Remember when we used to flock together, instead of just tweeting all day on line?"

"Hey, Gary? As a general rule we don't play God up here."

'Mr.Shumway here is our visiting ethicist.'

"You cheated on the assignment and got an A? Glad to see you've learned a useful life skill."

'But what if you're a masochist...?'

'Sorry, but we already know who we're going to hire for our new ethics director. We just posted the job for show.'

"Nothing about selling inside trade secrets?"