Modern Marriage Enthusiasts T-Shirts

"If you both agree to the terms and conditions, press, 'I accept'."

". . . Do you both like and subscribe. . ."

'I now pronounce you man and wife, you now may kiss you sweet little bachelor butt goodbye.'

"...And do you promise if you ever should divorce that you'll remain friends?"

'....Till death do you part, don't say I didn't warn you.'

Online Dating

As long as there are husbands, we'll get our's money's worth!

"You may now kiss the bride."

INTERNET MARRIAGE.

"And do you, Stephanie, promise to love, honor and 'obey'?

"Do you...enter name...take...enter name...to be your...choose one from the pull down menu...click the I do icon now please."

"Congratulations, dude, and you may now play tonsil hockey with the bride."

'No, there isn't a probationary period!'

"Morning, Brad." "Morning, Angelina."

Mrs Cat waiting for Mr Cat coming home late.

So all is not rosy in the garden?

"I'm the lot of baggage he comes with."

"By the time we can marry in all fifty states, we'll probably be divorced."

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, for whatever that's worth these days.'

"Steve and I live together, but we're getting indicted separately."

Apply to marry multi-marriage failure.

Gender Symbols

"I love marriage...It's my husband I hate."

"We even tried cyber sex, but the line was always busy."

'I'm not the sitting tenant, I'm your husband.'

'I thought Lobsters mate for life.'

"I married for contrast."

Effective Catcalls

"I'd like you to meet my Husband 2.0!"

"Why, it's a little piece of red yarn! Oh Harold, you always know JUST what to get me."

'I usually don't do online dating.'

'And do you, Rob, promise to love and cherish Simone, even if she earns more than you do?'

"Well, Pook, here's to one old marriage that just won't go away."

"I agreed to 'for better' and 'for worse,' but never to 'for mysterious' and 'withholding'."