Modern Management Aficionado T-Shirts

'We've decided to upgrade your position with a new version 2.0 employee.'

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

"I've just never worked anyplace where the 'alpha male' was a woman."

"Damnit, executive-trainees don't have 'accidents'."

'The ultimate sign of success is when no one puts you on hold.'

'Now this is exactly what I was referring to when I talked about 'scope creep'.'

Office temperature.

Big Shot/Bigger Shot.

Mr Yomp quickly got the hang of his new laptop.

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

The little engine that could delegate.

Subordinate Employee

Leadership Training

'We had no contingency plan for things going right.'

The little engine that delegated

"I make it a point to hire people smarter than me."

Businessman has Sterling Sign Shaved in Head.

The Genghis Khan School of Business Skills

Welcome to Yellow Pages, Vermont

"Can you keep a secret, Fred? The truth is, I've never had a clue what curve it is I'm supposed to stay ahead of!"

'What do you mean by, your people do not want to get in touch with my 'kind' of people?'

Making The World A Better Place for Giant Multinational Corporations

'It's important that I see eye-to-eye with any consultants we bring in.'

"Norman, leadership is about more than telling everyone to be more like you."

'It's true, nobody ever elected me C.E.O. However, I always just assumed I was.'

"Dear, it's the financial news. Seat belts fastened, seat backs in upright position."

"You have no idea how political this place is."

"Employee satisfaction is of utmost importance and I'm not leaving this chair till you are satisfied."

"The new boss might seem severe, but he won't bite your head off!"

'...OK so you've got the herd mentality... now go out tere and be a herd... now move!'

Company Structure - Boss and his yes men.

'What the hell is a win-win situation?'

'Turn up the air conditioning. Panting always puts us at a disadvantage during negotiations.'

Drones deliver gold, frankincense and myrrh to baby Jesus.

"This is Bernard, our new management consultant. He is going to be responsible for draining the lifeblood out of staff in a relentless attempt to reach increasingly unachievable and meaningless targets."