Modern Literature Lover Gifts

Book Worm

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"You're going to hate yourself."

Victor Hugo

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

First Novels.

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

Tut and Carmen.

The DaVinci Code

Thomas Mann.

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

'For those with books, open and follow along. For those with laptops, follow me on Twitter.'

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

"For the last time stupid, you're tin man, you are not by any leap of the imagination, anything like Iron Man!"

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

Voltaire

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

"Now I really hate poetry."

Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.

Television Readers.

Jean-Paul Sartre

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"My novel is not a doorstop!"