Modern Lifestyle Critic Pillows

Tunnel of Likes

"... with a side of brown rice, right. And can the delivery guy stop at the pharmacy and pick up my prescription?"

"You are still here."

'This appliance will replace that other appliance which replaced all those original appliances.'

'When you play house, for the sake of your grandmother, please keep your role playing traditional.'

Ten Plagues for Today's Seder

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

'Fetching newspapers is over. Now I aggregate blogs for him.'

Fur Baby

"It keeps it out of sight when we're not watching it."

"Their wedding registry has 8 place settings of double wall, stainless steel water bottles."

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

'Apparently it downloads data to your brain.'

"It's a mixed-use facility: retail space, low-rent housing, luxury apartments, and an area set aside for making steel."

"Why would I want to see anything that far away from my phone?"

'Shouldn't we be doing this online?'

"....Reception on my tablet is so much better since I added wifi to my mule..."

'Mom, can you tell me about the days before Pilates and Latte's?'

'I've been watching TV all my life. I was born cable ready.'

Early Man Late Man

Daily Routine

"As soon as I reconfigure the router, I'll reset my WIFI connection, download and unzip my files, and then I can start the presentation on how to simplify your life!"

The Eternal Question

Goodnight Social Media.

Man watches a cat enter a pet door to a "V.I.P. Lounge" in an airport

"Photo safaris are not what they used to be: They seem more interested in taking selfies than photos of us these days..."

Our Troubled Chowders