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Destinations

Ten Plagues for Today's Seder

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

Changing Minds

"Here's something called "The Fifty Greatest Countdown Shows Ever!""

The Evolution Of Man.

"It keeps it out of sight when we're not watching it."

'I'm terribly worried, Doctor - he doesn't talk back to Bill O'Reilly any more.'

Early Man Late Man

"Show me a man who's optimistic about the human race..."

Daily Routine

Man watches a cat enter a pet door to a "V.I.P. Lounge" in an airport

Truth

"They put nipples on the mannequins so you'll look at the stupid sweaters. Duh!"

"Is there someone have called Frobisher?"

"No way! You're a telemarketer?! This is so great – hold on, I want to get comfortable ... how did you get my number?"

"I've got something in what used to be a decrepit, run-down, unfashionable area."

'I can remember when paranoia was unusual.'

"The doctor wants you to point to where it hurts."

Blues for now.

"I'm charging you with texting and driving."

Our Troubled Chowders

'I was texting when my pop spilled on my laptop, which made me drop my iPod. So you see, officer, it wasn't my fault. Blame technology.'

"Scan my own items, bag my own food? If I wanted to work here, I'd fill out an application!"

Bowther, Wilkin, Lynch & Fisk

"It just doesn't crackle like the one on Netflix."

"He doesn't have to worry about his preschool placement - he interviews well."

'We're looking for a wifi hotspot.'

"Meaning of life!!" "Meaning of 'Game of Thrones' series finale"

"I can't eat these nutrition bars. They're for women."

"I'm pretty sure there's a Starbucks on the other side of that big rock."

Man calling Phone Privacy Centre

'David, I want you tested for steroids.'

"The public's taste in entertainment has certainly changed."