Modern Home Renovator Gifts

"Careful in the bathroom—we just had it reimagined."

Painting by the numbers for adults

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

Painting the Ceiling

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

'I found the termites!'

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

'Can I invite my friends round to watch, Mom?'

"I think I perferred the plain magnolia"

Another All Steel Home Built By Wit Construction.

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

'Come on, you can help me to choose some lovely wallpaper.'

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'

'You've reached McWit Quality Construction. If your foundation has cracked, press 1, if your plumbing is leaking press 2, if your house is collapsing, press 3 ...'

'Wow...Your work is amazing!'

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

"Well, yes, it's not what you would call a practical nest, but my wife insisted on using an architect..."

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

"You're welcome."

"We went for Scandinavian interiors."

Frog to other frog: 'Hey, nice pad.'

"I said to myself, 'Maybe I can't change the world, but I can remodel my bathroom.' "

'MY husband made the coffee table out of an old door.'

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

"See this area right here, honey? This is why we need to find someone who knows what they're doing."

"Everything you say (or don't say) matters. Choose your words and intentions carefully."

'I've had the place gob-stopper-dashed.'

"Maybe the termite problem should take precedence over the chimney problem."

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

New Coat of Paint at the Sistine Condos

I'm starting to think our new hardwood floor is made of driftwood.