Modern Finance Realist T-Shirts

We've been pre-approved by the credit card company to give them a loan.

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

Road Forks in the Road: No Way and Yes Way.

'... And this is Goldsmith, our futures consultant.'

"This is the World Bank? Somehow, I had pictured it differently."

Depressed Businessman at Office Christmas Party.

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

"See? A huge surge in all the major crowdfunding sites right before the Big Bang!"

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

'But I do have fun. I have lots lots of fun. I have lots of fun making money.'

"We do have faith but I'm afraid our policy is still not to accept Bitcoin."

"I hate this time of year."

'We were in the right place at the right time but, unfortunately, we were in the wrong time zone.'

Recession

"The red bars represent the obscene numbers this quarter. The black bars are censoring those red bars."

'Good news, Mr. Blume! Your condition isn't serious - just expensive.'

Catastrophe Risk Insurance

"Have you ever given any thought to what you're going to do after all your hopes and dreams are crushed?"

'Well they often get it wrong.'

'I think you need to reboot your fiscal compass.'

'Well, that's simplified the mission statement.'

Great moments in science. . . 'Nice work, you've isolated the funding gene.'

"I'm not particular, I'll take any job that will replace a human."

"How will you be paying? Crypto, Venmo, electronic fund transfer, credit card, check, cash, precious metals, brightly colored shells or livestock?"

"This one's really scary. It's about what's happening to my 401k."

"Financial Adviser advises client 'I advise you that you're broke'."

"I worry that we're headed for a future where you won't be able to earn three hundred times the salary of your lowest paid worker."

'After only a few years in the market I had a small fortune - unfortunately I'd started out with a big one.'

"Goodbye cruel world."

US Dollar weakens.

"All agreed? We buy low and sell high."

The Tobin Tax.

Squeezing a tight budget...

'Greenspan today explained the reason the Fed faises interest rates is so they can lower them again.'