Modern Distraction Fan T-Shirts

"Well, I've got rather a lot on at the moment."

Pre-Television Man Caves

'I'm very confused. I never had a father. I was raised by two mummies.'

Drive Through: Attorney, Therapy and Prayer

'I love what you've not done with the place.'

I'm a child of the early 5o's who has found time in retirement to become tech savvy. You're a mid-century modern.

"I finally figured out what was causing my backache. You know that fancy modern office furniture I ordered a few weeks back? I just realized. I've been sitting on the wastebasket."

Pizza-Matic

"You've taken some creative liberties, Noah."

"If Heather has two mommies, and each of them has two brothers, and one of those brothers has another man for a 'roommate,' how many uncles does Heather have?"

Snow White was a sucker for red apples, tattoos, and guys with beards.

"I consider the day a success when I leave the office and have to tiptoe through pieces of broken paradigm!"

"It's 3D 4K HD - ideal for my old silent movie collection."

'Let's play house. You be the stay-at-home dad, and I'll be the career mom.'

Lincoln's Gettysburg URL Address

'Hey, man, that's not how we do the flash mob!'

Vents, real and digital.

Furniture for the age of anxiety.

3...2...1...I'm Recording

"I'll confess, the first time I realized they didn't have any panes it gave me quite a turn!"

"Hey boy! Hey! Hey! Hey! Are those earbuds? Hey!!"

"How's that computer manual coming along?"

'Food? Do you think I'm the kind of mother that cooks?'

"Time for some herdin' music, eh, girl?"

It's a text from the patient. He says 'more anesthetic, please.'"

'I know a trap when I see one.'

"Don't be scared! I'm just wearing this old x-ray gear for throwback Thursday."

His video of Jack and Jill is going viral already.

"More e-mails Mrs. Jones."

"Do you know who I'd like a one-to-one with?"

'I hear he died laughing...while texting.'

GPS and Cardio Workout

'Paul, I think that Jane and yourself might make more progress if you left your boyfriend at home.'

'You've got to give up these escape attempts,'

"Ooh, look, his first text message."