Modern Business Guru T-Shirts

'The check is in the email attachment.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

"So, we look to the fourth quarter as a time of healing."

The MBA Draft

'Don't worry. No one else knows what they are doing either.'

"Think outside the box but never forget who owns the box."

'I'm sorry but I'm afraid the corporation is going in a different direction.'

'The good news is, we did as well as expected last quarter. The bad news is, we didn't expect to do too well.'

'You'll be happy to see that I've finally managed to turn things around.'

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

'Now then - I just wanted to see how you handle pressure, Mr. Boyle.'

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

Career opportunities

"Uh-Oh..."

'Kroft, Kroft, Kroft...to thine own demographic be true!'

"My best managerial trait is that I dig for answers until I get them between my teeth. My worst trait is that sometimes I bury them."

Economic Outlook Conference - 'Remember the seating is optimist, pessimist, optimist,...'

Target your customer.

'Our job will be to drag the competition down to our level.'

"He thought this would illustrate the company hierarchy more clearly than the organizational chart."

The bad news is our boxer shorts are still bursting into flames. The good news is our brand recognition is through the roof

"Unless one is a humorist, Haskins. One should avoid attempts at humor."

"I always try to give out at least one genuine compliment per day. I don't always succeed."

"We're counting on you to reverse this trend before this afternoon's investors meeting."

Business is off the chart.

"If I seem excited, Mr. Bolling, it's only because I know that I can make you a very rich man."

Early Business Planning

Whack-a-mole CEO.

'Mom's baking finally allowed us to diversify and greatly increase our neighborhood market share.'

"I can't sit down. Don't you remember? I worked my butt off for you."

"I think you might need to start again."

"Not bad, considering no one knows exactly what we produce or sell here."